Strength Is Strength No Matter Where It’s Found

So a couple of weeks ago I was having somewhat of a pity party for myself. A relationship had just ended and I was all why the fuck can’t I find someone that wants to stick around. I mean, I am a good person. I am a fun person. I am a generally happy person. But I was in a state of self-doubt. We all have those times. I know this to be true because a few of my single friends have opened up to me and told me they also have these times of self-doubt.

I have to explain the social media connection I have so that you understand the rest of this story. I have told you all before that I love social media. I have met some really great people in some of the best chat rooms. I am a self-confessed twitter addict (although that addiction is weaning). But I do love the chat rooms. There is a group of 5 girls that are the strongest, most amazing women I know. They saw that I wasn’t acting myself and they jumped into action. If you’ve never experienced social media this way, let’s just say, you are missing out. These women are pretty amazing and I am honored to call them my friends. We may never met face to face but they are as real as the day is long. Ok, that said…

So one of the woman basically told me to get my head out of my ass and just be me. These girls came up with a plan for me to get my mojo back. I am pretty gregarious. I have a larger than life personality. And they explained that most times I light up the chat room when I come barrelling in. So they bounced ideas back and forth on how they were going to get me to own that in a real life scenario. And boy did they.

They decided that I was going to walk into a place and own it. Like I usually do. So they came up with questions that I had to walk up to random people (men people) and ask. Now in order for them to know that I was actually doing this, I was to record the conversation that I was going to have. As the questions came rolling out over the screen, I was giggling to myself. They were funny questions. Ice breaker questions if you will. Questions like…
What is your favorite color of the alphabet?
Why do bald men have to wear a hairnet if they cook in a restaurant?
What 3 things do you never leave the house without?
What is your theme song?

So my task was set out before me. I had accepted this challenge. I could do this I had decided. Besides, who doesn’t like to have fun? All those thoughts were in my head till I walked into the first pub. Then I got a little more nervous. Luckily I had chosen a place that my girlfriend works as a Manager. I told her my plan and she was a great cheerleader. “HELL YA THIS IS SOOOOOO YOU” she laughed. Ok, maybe I was this crazy and brave. Well, the crazy part for sure. I had a couple beverages (liquid courage) and was just about to give this a go, when my girlfriend I was supposed to be meeting messaged me to meet her at another pub. Well then.

I packed up and headed over to the other pub that we would meet at. As I was walking into the new location, there were 3 men standing outside chatting. I decided they would be my first victims… I mean volunteers. So I threw my shoulders back and walked right over to them.

“Hi. My name is Debbi. My girlfriends are trying to get me back to feeling my old self and have sent me on a quest. Do you mind if I ask you a couple of questions? Oh, and record you as we do this?”

The one younger guy dove in head first. Put his arm around me and said “shoot”. So I began. They laughed as they answered. They kept asking me to ask them more. They were having as much fun with this as I was. That’s when my girlfriend walked up. She was shaking her head and probably thinking “oh lawd, what is that girl doing now?” I hadn’t told her this was a part of the evening… SURPRISE!!

The guys wanted another questions. My girlfriend stood there wondering what I was doing. I did the right thing… I asked them what their theme song was! And without missing a beat the 2 younger guys broke out into song. “I’m Coming Home” was the song of choice for them. I am not entirely sure why. I was actually laughing too hard to ask them. It was great.

We ventured into the pub. A couple of beverages where purchased for my girlfriend and I. I had made some new friends. But I also know that my online girlfriends would be disappointed if I stopped there. So I made new friends with a different table of guys. I was getting braver. And having so much fun. Next thing I knew the manager of the bar sat down with my girlfriend and I. He bought us each a beverage. We were making friends all over the place in that little pub.

My point in this story is that even though I had never seen these online ladies, they knew that something was not quite right. They jumped into action from thousands of miles away to get me back in the game. They cared enough to reach out. Now I could have declined their invite to play. But it was time to step away from the beautifully set pity party table I had set for one.

These ladies may never know just how much I appreciate them. They may never get one of my hugs to say thank you. They may only ever get my words of appreciation. But they get me. So social media or not, these ladies rock. And just like my friends in ‘real life’ they are as real to me as if I was face to face with them. You may never know just where your strength is going to come from in a time of need. It may be a stranger’s smile. It may be a closer friend that you have had for years. It may be a family member. It may be some crazy chick on the other end of your smart phone.

I just wanted to thank them for being my leaning post in my time of need. Ladies, you’d be proud. I am back to my old self of being that larger than life person again. My smile is back in place. My laugh is loud is again. And I am out being me, the only way I know how.

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Debbi Serafinchon Written by:

Just an average ordinary woman being herself on this crazy ride we call life. I say what I mean and mean what I say. I chose to bring along 4 crazy side kicks on this journey, my 4 kids. The actual realization of my journey began after my divorce. Hindsight being what it is, I realized before my divorce I was just going through the steps. My eyes are now wide open to the path ahead of me.

2 Comments

  1. Derby
    June 29
    Reply

    Not sure why – but this touched me…..way to go kiddo !

    • June 29
      Reply

      Thx for stopping by and reading. It amazing what happens when you let it!

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