I’ve had a lot of time to spend with my 2 youngest teens this past week. And we’ve had a lot of time spent in a vehicle. Between running Mason to and from football camp, buying his first vehicle, regular everyday chores and trying to get Miss Parker ready to leave for school, we have really had a lot of close knit time together in a car.
Now most times my teens will spend that ‘quality’ time looking down at their phones. Or arguing over the music selection, if I give in and let them play music in the car (I like my quiet time and the car seems to be the only place that I can get quiet. So my radio is seldom on). Or they spend that time just plain arguing. It amazes me just how much they can find to argue about! Siblings!! But every now and then one of them will say something rather profound and it sparks a discussion. This one went something like this…
Me: this week has really left me feeling rather uncentered.
Mason: Mom, you are one person that is the farthest from center that I know. Way off in left field.
Me: WHAT??!! I think I am a very well-balanced person (yes, lots of sarcasm was inserted there)
Mason: I think that all kids grow up thinking that adulthood is going to be awesome. And I think all adults just wanna be kids. You Mom, have perfected being the best adult kid I know.
Mason: I mean that in a good way. You just do what you want but still do all the things an adult has too. I think you have the best of both worlds Mom. And I hope I can be just like that.
Me: Thank you. I think.
Mason: You’re welcome.
That conversation took place the other day on our way to football camp. It has sat with me ever since. What exactly does that mean? I am the best adult kid that my teenager knows? Does it mean I am immature? Does it mean that I am not good with responsibility? Does it mean I am just a big kid playing at being an adult? Does it mean I am not a good role model?
That brought to mind another discussion I had with Raedean, who is half way around the world right now. I messaged her to explain I had lost my job and was thinking that maybe this is a good time to write. She kinda lost her mind a little (again with the sarcasm). She freaked out a little and asked about bill payments, my one kid that was off trying to figure out where he fits in to society, one that is about to be moved away from home to a boarding school. You have responsibilities Mom. You have kids to take care of. You need to be mature about this! I found that really rich coming from a 25 year old that had packed up at 19 to visit Australia and was currently in Europe, living her dream. So much so that I got a little unhinged in my response back to her.
I have been in far worse situations than this! And not only did I pull through but so have my kids! You, missy, are living proof that when it comes to making adult decisions, I know what I am doing!
So combine all this talk about having to ‘adult’ and I think I am doing a pretty good job. No I am not the most mature adult you will ever meet. No I don’t always do or say the right things. Yes, I have been known to break out in a dance competition in the kitchen with my kids while making dinner. I love it when people mistake me for younger than I am. I like to think it is my youthful looks, but I am pretty sure it is the immaturity they see.
Life is too damn short.
It will bring you down if you let it. Loss of a job. Having to make a decision on putting your pet down. Deciding if the best thing for your 14 year old would be to send her away to a private boarding school. And that has been just this week. Are they easy decisions or life situations to handle? No. But I have handled these and many others. I have never been one to bury my head in the sand and let someone else figure it out. Nor will I ever be. I know how to adult! I don’t do it with the grace that some do, but I do it. Why? because I am an adult!
So here is to laughing to loud. Smiling to big. Saying the wrong thing at the wrong time. Embarrassing my kids more than I ever embarrass myself. Rolling my eyes at the real adults worrying about what the neighbors have. To escaping to the lake just because. To long drives when windshield time is needed. To jumping on a plane to help a friend rather than scouring the internet for a job. To not keeping my house as clean as I could. To having a beer at 10am at a rugby game just because I felt like it. To dancing in the rain when others are running for cover. All the big girl decisions I have to make will get made. But they will be made on my time, with my flare. Cause I am the best adult kid that my kid knows dammit!
And besides, you need someone off in left field to catch the unsuspecting fly balls that might just get hit out that way.